Greenbelt Ministry

Greenbelt Ministry
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I was ministered to at Greenbelt.
In an unexpected way
I had to queue to get it
Ye highlight of my day

My fellow queuers clearly
Had received such love before
It was painted on their faces;
Eager, smiling… wanting more

I knew I’d made the perfect choice
Joined this queue – this one alone
My happy fate approacheth
Secret fantasies finally known.

Heidi was my pie of choice
Goats cheese and potato sweet
(Pretentious and middle class)
Though Moo and Blue looked fab to eat

And how I loved the taste
Of the pretentious middle-class
It hugged my soul so very tight
My expectations were surpassed.

Lo, the pie was not alone
Yet adorned with a dollop of mash
Not as grim as at school meals
Miles advanced of that trash

To make it even more divine
Gravy was poured on top
Though they had named it ‘groovy’
How very quaint is this shop?

There were no lies abounding
Groovy was at the core
‘Tis why I gave up six pounds fifty
And considered coming back for more

Heidi was now my one true love
(Hubby could have cause for concern
But then he’s never had a Heidi
Not as far as I’ve known)

The pies that they were out of
Were blessed with a little note
‘Gone to pie heaven’
A very groovy quote

It seems they’re Made in Banksy-land
Rather than Hong Kong
Formerly known as Bristol
Where queues are just as long

At the Belt that’s made of Green
A queue is so the norm
If Brits are fairly into queues
It’s for what Greenbelter’s are born

We queue to get in on day one
For talks and music too
We stand and wait, then waiteth some more
We even queue to poo

So if they tried to sell their pies
In lands far far from here
Would people queue up orderly?
Would anarchy appear?

A tiny prick of tears is formed
When one is forced to think
Of worried pies, of Heidi’s cries
With anarchy on the brink

When my body’s all queued out
And numbered are my days
Pie Heaven’s where I’m destined
My ticket is One Way

pieminister (the pie shop’s name)
Will dominate the place
Pies will be free; queues will be gone
Pie smiles on every face

They’ll be no tears nor pain nor fear
Due to pies for all the hours
Clouds made from mash will float on by
And rain down groovy showers

The Lord of the Pies will sort me out
Heidi greet me at the Pie-ly Gate
I will scoff and not grow weary
Munch pies, and not be faint

—————————————————

Please note, this poem is not sponsored by pieminister, and I live at least an hour away from Bristol.
Feel free to view my GB piccies here

4 Comments

  1. Reply

    I have just found you poem and am very touched that you have taken the time to write it and you enjoyed the pies so much. Not to mention the fact that it is really good..

    With your permission could i publish it on our next newsletter. If you say yes i will send you a box of pies by way of a royalty.

    Thanks again, and keep on writing…

    Jon
    Founder of pieminister…

    • Reply

      / Yet another example of Christians attempting to bully the rest of us to put up with their attempted take over of our govt. institutions. The court is paid for by many non-christians and Christians have no business bullying there way onto govt. building property trying to "spread the message". Christians have long had an entitled mentality in this country and it's about time some organizations are standing up to them. There is no "war on Christianity" – there is a war for equal treatment against the long entitled position Christianity has maintained.

  2. Reply

    Yes, that’s fine Jon!

    box of pies… fab! I did actually queue for a moo and blue but they had run out, but hey, a selection would be groovy.

    and if you could poss send me a copy of the newsletter when it’s printed, or a link if it’s an online newsletter, that would be most fab!
    and if you could poss put my name and blog address with it, that would be cool.

    cheers
    annie

  3. Pingback: AnniePorthouse.com » Blog Archive » being paid in pies!

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